Andrewes

1I will go over all my sins before theei

2In the bitterness of my soul:

3O that it were in bitterness most bitter.[Ibid. and ver. 17]ii

4Lord, if a man so live, and the life of my spirit be in such things,

5thou wilt correct me and make me to live.[ver. 16]

6For behold, in my peace

7my bitterness was made most bitter.[ver. 17]

8But I, like a swallow's young, will chatter,

9I will mourn as a dove.[ver. 14]iii

10And I beseech thee, Lord, by all thy mercy,

11That thy most just indignation and thy wrath be turned from me,

12Because I have sinned, and that grievously, I have sinned against thee,

13Grievously and often have I sinned against thee.

14II. O Father of mercies,

15I beseech the fatherly bowels of thy compassions,

16And { an unclean worm, / a dead dog, / a putrid carcase, } O despise me not.

17Nay rather look upon me, Lord,

18Look with those eyes

19wherewith thou lookedst on { the Magdalen at the feast, / Peter in the hall, / the Thief on the gibbet; }iv

20That with { Peter I may weep, / the Thief confess, / the Magdalen love; }

21That I may love thee much,

22Yea most, as one to whom most is forgiven.

23Spare, I pray thee, Lord; spare, spare the penitent;

1Surely { him that is minded and desirous to repent; / him that thinketh over his sins with bitterness, / him that is indignant with himself for the sins he hath done, / him that remembereth thy most bitter Passion, / and cleaveth unto it. }i

2Spare, Lord; be merciful.

3Spare me, Lord, be merciful unto me;

4Have mercy upon me,

5Seeing it { is not hard to thy power, / nor unbecoming to thy justice, / nor unwonted to thy clemency. }

6III. What, for leeks and for garlick,ii

7the Bread of Angels?

8What, for the husks of swine,

9my Father's table?

10Woe is me, wretched, woe is me, senseless!

11Who hath bewitched me

12that I should so dote?

13O if thou wouldest but vouchsafe to receive me,

14I am wholly minded to return:

15For then was it better with me than now.

16Wholly confounded therefore,

17{ Not worthy to name / Nor to call upon / Nor to think in my heart } thy Nameiii

18but for thy inborn goodness;

19Yet trusting in that,

20{ a suppliant, / abased, / prostrate, } I return unto thee;

1Nor do I ask that thou do

2aught but what thou hast done most often,

3And doest most willingly;

4Which unless thou wert to do again and again,

5No flesh should stand,

6None should abide it.

7Have mercy upon a sinner, upon the greatest of sinners,

8And therefore upon one that needeth the greatest mercy.

9And thine is the greatest,

10And reacheth even unto the heavens,

11And plucketh out of the nethermost hell.

12Marvellous it is.i

13Shew thy marvellous mercy toward me:

14Which if thou wilt glorify beyond measure,

15Hold it out to me.

16Never, never in the pardon of any sinner

17More glorious { either was it, / or shall it be. }

18Lord, if thou wilt that I depart from thee, give me another Thee,ii

19Else will I not let thee go.

20Let the Spirit of truth teach me the truth.

21IV. To thee, Lord, I confess

22(Because, if I would, I cannot hide them);

23To thee my sins, most many, most great, most grievous.

24I profess also that I grieve for them, which thou too knowest.

25But that I have sinned more than I grieve,

26which grief lieth by me, that I might weep for my sins.

27So great a grief I lack, I lack it utterly.

28Far am I from being what it is meet I should be.

29Much can I sin;

1Much can I not grieve.

2My drought, my drought! woe is me!i

3I cannot much, but I desire much.

4For I know that not much is much enough.

5Would God that grief were at hand for me;

6yea, would God a greater.

7But I cannot obtain it of myself.

8I am dried up, dried up like a potsherd.ii

9Woe is me!

10Thou, Lord, { increase that which I have, / supply that which I have not, } a fountain of tears,

11a melting heart, groanings that cannot be uttered.

12Meanwhile, seeing the spirit is willing with me,

13Accept thou me according to that I have,

14Not according to that I have not.

15But I will lengthen it out, since I cannot strain it further,iii

16through all the years of my life.

17V. But having so often fallen back, with what face, with what mind

18shall I now be able to return?

19With none.For wholly confounded,

20Covered with mine own confusion, I { walk, / sit, / lie down. }

21Nor durst I do it,

22Nor would I, but that I should despair outright,

23And do that which they do that despair,

24Save that there is yet hope left.

25What hope?

26That unto seventy times seven

27Thou reachest forth thy mercy.

1And beyond,

2For this is the measure thou hast commended to us.i

3To us, that we should render it among ourselves,

4And thou thyself not render the same?

5Nay, thou wilt render it, and much more.

6God forbid thou shouldest will more perfection to be in us

7than is in thyself.

8That thou shouldest will us to forgive unto seventy times seven,

9And thyself be unwilling.

10For thy mercy surpasseth ours,

11as far as thou surpassest us.

12Trusting therefore in that,

13yea, in thy mercy that pardoneth four hundred and ninetyii

14times over,

15Standing afar off I cast myself down,iii

16And most abjectly, as is meet, and most humbly

17Smiting that heart of mine

18(Which smiteth me not enough),

19{ I say / and say again } over and over,

20Be merciful, { Lord, to me a sinner, / to me the most wretched sinner, / to me the chief of sinners, / to me that am all sin, / to sin exceeding sinful, }

21O thou to whom none ever sueth without hope of pardon!

22VI. But that he should be merciful, and thou not grieve?

23I ask it not.

24For grieve I do, after a fashion;

25I fear indeed that it is but enough.

1I would desire it were more;

2I should rejoice if it were more;

3I grieve that it is not more.

4For I desire that I might more, and

5I grieve that more I cannot.

6I confess my grief is to be grieved for,

7And I grieve myself that it is so much to be grieved for.

8And, O who shall give me that I might more and more?

9I, if it lay with me, would perform it.

10But with me it lieth not;

11It is not in my power.

12With me indeed it lieth to prize that which is more;

13yea, to will that it were more.

14To will is present with me; but to perform I find not.i

15Thou, Lord, give: with thee it lieth to give.

16Thou that turnest even the flint into standing water.ii

17Give tears; give a fountain to my head.

18Give the grace of tears.

19Drop down, ye heavens, from above,

20And water the drought of my desert.

21Give, Lord, this grace,

22No gift were welcomer to me,

23Not great riches,

24Not earthly things, no, not the best;

25Than if thou give me tears;

26Such as thou grantedst David of old, or Jeremiah:iii

27Such as thou grantedst the Magdalen, or Peter.

28At least a dropping eye,

29that I be not all flint.

30Not that I may wash my bed,

1Not that I may water thy feet,

2Not copiously, as Jeremiah,

3Not bitterly, as Peter,

4(Though O, that it were so!)

5Yet one little tear at the least

6And a second supply thou;

7Which thou mayest lay up in thy bottle,

8Which thou mayest enter in thy book.

9But if I obtain not even this — ah, pumice-stone!i

10Ah me, very quicklime! seething in cold water,

11Without, where it less behoveth, without fervour,

12Where it behoveth not, grieving enough,

13Where it most behoveth, cold, dry, dead,

14At least of the tears of thy Christii

15Impart to me some,

16Which in the days of his flesh he shed abundantly.

17Impart, O impart to me of them.

18There is left over in him for me what in myself is lacking to me.

20O my Saviour, Christ, my Saviour,

21Who shall grant me that I may die

22before I offend thee again,

23Christ my Saviour, O my Saviour?

24O Lord, let a new manner of life

25shew that a new Spirit is come upon me;

26For true penitence is a new life,

27And true confession is to repent without ceasing,

28keeping a perpetual sabbath